My four friends named Fred

I probably weigh about a pound less this evening than I did this morning. That's because at today's visit the doctor took off all but four of the 50 billion or so rubber bands he had locking my jaws in place for the last three weeks. Now, I just have two on each side. That's quite a difference. And -- drum roll -- I can take them off to eat. Yesssss.

So, I pureed (still have to do that) a can of beef stew thinned out with some chicken broth and promptly shoveled it down. Man, was that good. A great cure for the blues.

The only problem is, the configuration of these rubber bands is like a sort of Chinese puzzle. The bands attach to my teeth via all the hooks on my braces. Each side has a band stretched in shape of a square (attached to four hooks) on top of another one in a very skewed triangle (attached to three, two of which are hooks shared with corners of the square). Both of the configurations anchor at the very back of my mouth. It took me about 20 frustrating minutes to get them back on.

So, I don't think I'm going to take them off for every single meal. Maybe twice a day. I just don't think it'll be practical any more often. But, I was able to clean the back sides of my teeth for the first time in two weeks. I know. Pretty disgusting. But, it feels so much better.

One interesting tidbit you may not know (and probably could do without knowing but will, because I feel strangely compelled to tell you) is that, for some odd reason, the manufacturer of these rubber bands, 3M, has different names for them based on how strong they are. I'm not talking about names like "medium" or "heavy" or "light." Oh, no. That would be waaaaaaaay too confusing. I'm talking about real names. Like "Fred." And "Elliot." And "Chuck." Really. See the photos of the packages below, in case you have any doubts. Not that I've lied to you so far. At least, not that you know of. Anyway ... .

Now, I'll admit that I'm a little odd. Heck, I like being odd. But, I gotta wonder: Did these geeks sit around and say, "Hey, you know, instead of 'heavy' why don't we call this one 'Fred'?" Maybe there were a lot of fumes involved in the manufacture of these things. And, I wonder why Elliot is a stronger band than Chuck, but Fred is stronger than Elliot. Quite the distrubing little visit into the mind of the industrial chemist, eh? ...




So, for the record, right now, I'm using four Freds. I hope that I can try four Elliots in a couple of days. I probably won't be hanging with any Chucks for at least a few weeks. I'm also include a picture of one of the Freds below, along with a pencil so you can see how big -- or small -- it really is. That thing next to it is the handy tool 3M provides to maneuver these things onto your teeth. Actually, they're fairly useful for the job. And -- no lie -- that one actually glows in the dark. Those must have been some pretty strong fumes at the rubber band factory . ...

Anyway, one bit of somewhat distressing news is that I won't be losing the splint at until sometime after six weeks. That sort of sucks. No, actually, it sucks big time. But, I guess I got one chance to do this as right as possible. I guess it all depends on how the jaws behave after today's parole. So, as long as they don't "posture," maybe I can ditch the splint soon, too. A few more steps ... a few more steps ... .